wander, wander
May. 5th, 2003 01:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
salixbabylongot so much accomplished this weekend; piddly, trivial things, but things to get marked off my list. called old friends, answered emails, made anniversary trip plans, had tea with a friend, movie-date, groceries, ironing, et cetera, ad nauseum. even some goof-off time and an afternoon nap.
big accomplishment - remembered how to knit, finished the green stripe and started a silver stripe. it's starting to looking like part of a scarf even!
read a few fics and lj entries and Dan Savage's recent columns and have a lot of thoughts churning in my head, about consent and kinky-people, and safety, and gay culture, and manipulation, exploitation, vulnerability, naivety, growing up. i've been whining a lot about being Almost Thirty for the last few months... but damn, i'm so happy to know the things i know now. i would never go back and have to go through all that uncertainty and not-knowing again. age does have distinct advantages, not the least of which is learning when to trust yourself and how not to get into situations you think you can't get out of.
been thinking about motherhood a lot too, lately... not sure how to mentally reconcile who i am, as a person, as a writer, as a sexual being, with the concept of "motherhood." while i know i'm hardly the first person to go through this (in all probability), my peers/friends who are mothers seem reluctant to talk about sex. way more so than before they got knocked up. most worrisome.
also, mentally hashing out a theory about being "in heat", not being quite the same but clearly related to the "biological clock" concept. all of my 30-something female friends not on the pill report being horny almost all the time, scaring our husbands and partners. glad i'm not alone, anyway!
final exam next week! yeiieeeeee!
when i've more time, want to do some serious typing-while-my-brain-wanders about two of the fics i read this weekend... both quite disturbing, can't seem to shake them from my head, and can't figure out why exactly... and i seem to think better with a keyboard under my hands.
big accomplishment - remembered how to knit, finished the green stripe and started a silver stripe. it's starting to looking like part of a scarf even!
read a few fics and lj entries and Dan Savage's recent columns and have a lot of thoughts churning in my head, about consent and kinky-people, and safety, and gay culture, and manipulation, exploitation, vulnerability, naivety, growing up. i've been whining a lot about being Almost Thirty for the last few months... but damn, i'm so happy to know the things i know now. i would never go back and have to go through all that uncertainty and not-knowing again. age does have distinct advantages, not the least of which is learning when to trust yourself and how not to get into situations you think you can't get out of.
been thinking about motherhood a lot too, lately... not sure how to mentally reconcile who i am, as a person, as a writer, as a sexual being, with the concept of "motherhood." while i know i'm hardly the first person to go through this (in all probability), my peers/friends who are mothers seem reluctant to talk about sex. way more so than before they got knocked up. most worrisome.
also, mentally hashing out a theory about being "in heat", not being quite the same but clearly related to the "biological clock" concept. all of my 30-something female friends not on the pill report being horny almost all the time, scaring our husbands and partners. glad i'm not alone, anyway!
final exam next week! yeiieeeeee!
when i've more time, want to do some serious typing-while-my-brain-wanders about two of the fics i read this weekend... both quite disturbing, can't seem to shake them from my head, and can't figure out why exactly... and i seem to think better with a keyboard under my hands.
