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salixbabylonTitle: Virulentus Somnium
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
salixbabylon
Fandom: Harry Potter
Characters: Harry/Severus
Rating: NC-17 overall
Word Count: 37,100 total
Disclaimer: Characters and places in this story, which appear in the Harry Potter novels, belong to JK Rowling, Bloomsbury, Warner Bros. and Scholastic. I don't make, or intend to make money out of them. They just wouldn't leave me alone
Summary: Two years after graduation, Harry's having nightmares at Hogwarts. Who will wake him up?
Previous Chapters
Part 8
2 AM, Day 6
Harry awoke to Severus' body curled around his and hands gently touching him again. He tried to control his breathing, fighting with himself not to respond or let Severus know what kind of effect the touches were having on him.
This is so stupid. When did I become such a coward? I'm scared to death, but I can't just lie here. What am I going to do?
While his mind struggled with feelings of modesty, embarrassment, and pride, his body acted on its own. Harry rolled onto his back and tentatively slid his hands up Severus' chest to his shoulders as he opened his eyes.
The darkness of the room hid nothing of the fire in those deep, intense eyes. The moment seemed like it would last forever. Gently, Severus' soft lips gently came down against his own. He's kissing me! So soft. Wonderful... Harry thought before the moment was over. Severus held his gaze for until Harry's hands again moved of their own accord from Severus' shoulders to the back of his neck, pulling him down again.
The next kiss was less tentative but no less gentle and Harry did his best to relax and enjoy it. Severus' lips were warm and smooth. Harry couldn't believe how wonderful something so simple felt, until his lips were suddenly met with a soft wet tongue probing between them. He opened his mouth in a quiet sigh. The amazingly sweet kiss began to morph into something passionate as the rest of Harry's body awoke from the fog clouding his brain from their first kiss.
His skin seemed to burst into flame; he could feel every millimeter where Severus' body pressed against his. Desire like nothing he'd ever felt swept through him. He wanted it all, everything, now, and the strength of his hunger was overwhelming. Wetness leaked down his cheeks as he moaned into Severus' mouth, clutching him closer, too transported to notice.
Again Severus was the one to pull away. When Harry opened his eyes he was met with a concerned expression as Severus gently dipped his fingertips into Harry's tears.
So much emotion filled him that it felt like his chest would burst. Instead, to his dismay, Harry found his eyes overflowing again. "I'm sorry," he whispered in a shaking voice. "I just- I didn't mean to. I'm just scared."
Severus' brow creased. "Scared of what? Not of something happening to one of us?"
"No! Of, well..." Harry looked away from the intense gaze and took a deep breath, his cheeks burning. "I don't know what I'm doing. At all," he admitted. "It was true, what I said before. No one's ever, um, kissed me before. I don't know what to do."
Severus smiled a little and answered in a velvety purr, "You're doing everything right so far. We don't have to do anything you don't want to do. Any time you want to stop, I promise it will be all right with me. Even if you just want to pause for a minute." His fingertips wiped away the moist tracks on the young man's face until Harry lifted his lips to kiss Severus again, pulling him close.
Their kisses went on and on, one melting into the other, soft kisses, tongues gently tasting each other's mouths. Every time the kisses started to grow more fervent, Severus pulled back, slowed down, and dropped tiny, soft kisses all over Harry's face. He was relieved that the other man didn't seem to want to go any faster than he wanted to, but at the same time found himself torn between the desire to lose himself in the cloying sweetness and the desire for more.
His hands grew more bold, feeling the shape of Severus' back and arms, drifting down to his waist, but not further before he got embarrassed. On their way back up, Harry suddenly found his wayward hands unbuttoning Severus' pajama top.
Severus held still until he finished, then shrugged off the shirt and rolled onto his back, pulling Harry up on top of him. The shock of warm bare skin against his own made Harry gasp, and the hardness of the erection pushing next to his own made him moan. Even through two layers of flannel, the intimate contact took his breath away.
Severus gave him a seductive smirk as his hands stroked Harry's back. "Shall I stop?"
Harry grinned back as he leaned forward and nipped at Severus' neck as an answer. His skin tasted wonderful, so Harry licked and sucked a trail up to an earlobe. When he gently pulled it into his mouth, Severus gasped and pushed his hips up into Harry's, breaking the younger man's concentration. Instinctively, Harry pushed down and they both moaned at the sensation.
Severus pulled him down for a deep kiss, more passionate than the previous ones, as if he wanted to taste every bit of Harry's mouth, sliding his tongue along Harry's and pulsing it into his mouth with the same slow thrusting rhythm as their hips.
Harry's head reeled for a moment, dizzy. Oh yes! So good. Want this. Want you..., he thought as their bodies ground into each other. Sensations and emotions crashed through him like trains on a collision course. Too fast!
"Wait. Stop," Harry panted, pushing himself away to lay next to Severus with his eyes shut.
"What's wrong?" Harry could hear the concern in Severus' voice and his accelerated breathing as well.
"Nothing. I just- I'm too close. I don't want it to be over yet," he confessed.
Something like the evil chuckle Harry remembered from class, but softer and infinitely more arousing, was breathed into his neck as Severus bent over him. "It won't be over until you want it to be, I promise," he said, licking Harry's neck.
Harry moved his head to the side to give Severus better access and moaned at the sensations flooding through him. Severus' hands began to wander over his chest and arms, barely grazing the skin with his fingertips, making Harry shiver and sigh uncontrollably.
"I thought. You said. We could stop. Any time."
Severus immediately moved back from Harry, who opened his eyes to search Severus' expression, confused.
"Of course. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push you," the older man apologized with some effort, withdrawing to the other side of the bed.
Harry took a deep breath, trying to slow down his madly beating heart. "Wait," he pleaded, reaching out to grab Severus by the wrist. "I didn't mean... I just needed to catch my breath. It's just really overwhelming. I feel- Gods, I don't know! I feel like everything in me is moving a billion miles a second. Like I can't take much more before I completely fall apart."
The corner of Severus' mouth quirked up. "That's how you're supposed to feel," he said in a voice that Harry had never heard before. Smokey. Seductive. "I'm thrilled to hear that's how I made you feel. You make me feel the same way."
His words seemed to reach into Harry and twist his insides around. He could feel the pulse in his body quicken again, and couldn't stop the slight whimper that escaped his lips. "Please," he heard himself ask, not entirely certain what he was asking.
Severus moved closer, pushing the blankets fully off of the bed, looking at Harry in the moonlight. At his body. Harry wondered how visible the blush covering his face and creeping down his chest was, and why he felt both horribly nervous and yet pleased that Severus would want to look at him.
He reached up to trail his fingers across Severus' skin, feeling the few scattered dark hairs on his chest, accenting the alabaster paleness. Harry's hands wandered up the smooth chest, lightly skimming over a nipple that made Severus suck in a shallow breath. Harry noted that for later. He continued up the long neck to the angular face, fingers tangling in the inky, silky black hair, eyes locked on the dark ones above him.
"You're so beautiful to me," Harry whispered as he leaned in for a kiss.
Severus groaned, returning his body to its former position on top of Harry's, grinding their erections together. His hands stroked a path from Harry's collarbone, down his slim chest, to his nipple. Clever fingers teased and pinched it lightly, making Harry gasp. As Severus' tongue twined around Harry's, he shifted his hands down the young man's stomach to the waistband of his boxers.
And waited.
Harry was barely conscious of the kisses stopping, lost in the fire Severus' hands were stoking in his body. One hand went away, only to come back on Harry's thigh, tickling sensitive flesh and then sliding slowly up over flannel. It paused as it rested alongside his cock; Harry's hips arched uncontrollably as his eyes locked onto Severus'.
"Oh please," he moaned, gasping as the strong hand responded, closing around his aching hardness.
Severus' hand stroked him slowly through the flannel as he dropped light kisses on Harry's forehead, temple, and neck. Harry's hands clutched onto Severus' arms, grasping for some stability as he moaned and writhed in his lover's hands.
"Oh god, please, take them off," he gasped desperately.
Fiery eyes locked onto his as Severus' hands slid to his waist, pushing the fabric down as Harry compliantly lifted his hips off the bed. Then those cool, smooth fingers were on his flesh, exploring every inch of his cock, stroking up and down. Finally Severus encircled him completely in a firm grip, and began to stroke him in earnest.
Harry's entire body was so focused, so tense, he knew he couldn't hold out for very long. He twined his arms around Severus, pulling him close for another kiss, desperate and hungry. On each exhale a keening sound escaped from deep in his throat, faster and faster as his eyes squeezed shut. He felt himself hovering on the edge of something terrifying and exquisite, Severus' body covering his own as he tenderly kissed Harry's face.
Severus' hands moved faster and faster until finally Harry's nerves could take no more. He was pulled into a firm embrace as he convulsed and howled his release in a wordless litany, blind to everything but the pleasure of his orgasm.
Harry's brain returned to his body to find his head pillowed on Severus' chest, arms wrapped around him. His toes tingled, his eyelids tingled; it felt like every cell in his body had climaxed and was still vibrating with afterglow. He sighed and smiled against Severus' chest, deeply content and satisfied.
"Back with me?"
Severus' hand smoothed down his back and Harry snuggled closer. "Mmmm," he mumbled, letting his fingers trail lightly down the other man's chest.
Severus sighed and covered Harry's hand with his own, trapping it before it could go any lower. He pulled the young man up and kissed him. "You're so beautiful when you come," he murmured against Harry's mouth, covering it with tiny kisses.
"I've never felt anything like that. Ever," Harry admitted.
Severus pulled back a little in surprise. "Ever? Not even by yourself?"
Harry shook his head. "Not like that. I've done it a few times, but... It's not easy to do without thinking of anyone. I tried every now and then but it was too hard. Once I thought of Malfoy, after he was gone. I thought it couldn't hurt. But I felt so terrible afterward. Why do you think I spent so much time flying and studying? I couldn't do anything about it and I was afraid of what would happen if I went to sleep frustrated," he explained simply.
Severus squeezed him tighter. "That's all behind you now. You're free to be as lustful as anyone else. No one can hurt you or anyone you desire."
Harry nodded. A moment later he dozed off in Severus' arms, safe and satiated.
*****
10 AM, Day 6
Harry awoke late the next morning, naked and sticky and inordinately pleased with himself. Also alone; Severus had apparently already woken up. He smiled at the pillows. He grinned at the stone walls. He beamed at the bedroom.
I had sex! Finally! It finally happened!
He stretched his arms over his head and untangled his legs from the sheets. He called Severus' name but there was no answer, so he got out of bed and bounced into the shower. He smiled at the toilet and bathtub, and the mirror winked back at him when he grinned at it.
Thirty minutes later he noticed he was getting a cramp in his cheeks from grinning so hard but he just couldn't stop. I'm not going to be able to leave this room. Ever. He contemplated for a moment what a tragedy it would be if he could never leave Severus' bedroom. His smile grew even bigger.
Everyone will know the moment they see me and this dorky grin. And if they don't know, I'll shout it at them, scream it from the parapets, take out a notice in the paper: "Boy Who Lived Finally Gets Laid!"
Well, mostly. Perhaps not by strict definitions, but last night certainly was enough to qualify as a good beginning.
Although I hardly got to do anything to him. I hope he didn't mind very much. Shit, I guess I just kind of fell asleep, didn't I? I hope he isn't angry. I'll make it up to him next time.
I hope there's a next time... Where did Severus go? Why did he leave me? I hope he doesn't think this was a mistake. Gods, please, please don't let him think that. It wasn't a mistake. It wasn't.
Who am I trying to convince here, Severus or myself?
Maybe it was a mistake. What if I've ruined everything, whatever it is that's been going on between us? I've told him so much, he's seen so much inside my head. What if he doesn't feel about me the way I feel about him?
How do I feel about him?
Fuck. I think I might love him. I'm not sure I know what love is, but... Friendship. Plus lust. And maybe something more, that I can't quite put my finger on. But what if one of us wants more than the other? How will we avoid hurting each other in the end?
Does it have to end?
I hate being so awkward, so unsure of what to do. So embarrassed... He was even my first kiss. He didn't seem surprised, but I wonder what he thinks now, in the light of day. About me being so untouched...
My head is spinning and my body is still hungry for him... I feel so utterly vulnerable. It's terrifying.
And I can still feel his hands everywhere on my skin.
*****
11 AM, Day 6
Severus was in the library again. Working, he reminded himself, wrenching his unruly thoughts from memories of last night and onto the books in front of him.
Lucius definitely thought up this curse. Narcissa's family was Italian originally, from somewhere in the Northern region, I seem to recall... Which means the cure, if there is one, probably comes from plants native to that area. Assuming I'm on the right track at all. A pity none of these herbals are arranged geographically...
Every time I get in bed with him, I completely lose control. I just can't stop touching him. He's too young, too fragile right now. I don't want to hurt him. But gods - I want to prove to him that he's not broken, not poisonous. He's beautiful. Pure.
And his skin is addictive. And the noises he makes. And the way he responds...
I hope last night wasn't a mistake. I hope he doesn't regret it.
I hope he doesn't regret that it was me. I can't accept that he wants me that way. Me, of all people.
This is moving too fast. It's not even been a week and I'm in love. Love. Me. With Harry bloody Potter. Of all the unexpected things in the universe, that's the last one I'd have thought possible.
Focus! This isn't helping anything. Read.
I hope he's not upset that I left him in bed. I know he's exhausted. By all rights I should be too. But he was sleeping so soundly that I didn't want to wake him. And for once, I don't think he was dreaming of anything at all. I hope not anyway.
He deserves so much. To be whole and happy and at peace. And to be loved. So much more than I could ever give him...
But. If no one else wants him... And if he seems to want me, for whatever reason... Who am I to push him away? I may not deserve him but I'll try.
I want to more than anything I've ever wanted.
*****
11 AM, Day 6
Harry stumbled into the library. One glance and Severus took in the conflicting expressions on his face; eyes filled with fear but mouth twitching and threatening to break into a grin.
"Sleep well?" Severus asked with a sparkle in his eyes that did not match his dry tone.
Harry nodded and stretched his arms over his head, ginning hugely, as he turned slightly pink. "I did. I'm sorry you, uh, didn't," he said somewhat questioningly.
Snape took his meaning. "I was satisfied."
Harry grinned again and looked at his feet. "Well, I hope you'll be more satisfied the next time. If there is a next time," he added when Severus failed to respond.
"Harry... We should talk about this. And we should finish with the curse. But one thing at a time. I suggest we deal with that first, if it's all right with you?"
Harry nodded quickly, disappointed by Snape's businesslike tone.
Snape continued. "I've gathered that this curse was conceived by Lucius Malfoy. Which may or may not have had an effect on its power once he was killed. If it did, that would explain why things got worse afterward. If not, well, no matter unless it complicates things further." He took a deep breath.
"I know this is going to sound like a highly fanciful shot in the dark at best, but I've learned over the years that following one's intuition is most valuable in counteracting the Dark Arts; the unconscious mind reveals patterns the conscious, logical mind cannot see."
"A few elements of an old story reminded me of your curse. Narcissa Malfoy's family was Italian. So was the story, which is about a toxic garden and the young girl who tended it. Some herbals seem to indicate a hint of underlying truth in the tale, that an extract of a highly deadly flower may be both a deadly poison and an antidote."
"I remember Lucius once mentioning something in passing as we discussed Dark potions, about a 'fiori della morte,' a 'flower of death,' found in the highest mountains near where Narcissa's family was from. Only those who had been raised in the area could get close to the flower at all without succumbing to its toxic vapors. No stranger could touch it and live."
Severus smiled wryly. "Lucius liked to combine subtlety and poetry into his curses, natural beauty and evil mixed in equal parts. To make them truly an art. He told me about the flower long before he knew I was a spy, but near the time Voldemort must have cursed you. I'm sure he thought I would appreciate the twisted beauty of such a curse and the only possible antidote."
"However, having had this idea, I don't think there is a way to test it except by trying. I have a colleague in Italy who I contacted earlier this morning and she is owling me some of the flower extract. One of the books I found from the 1300s has a potion recipe that mentioned both the flower and nightmares in an opening poem. It is all a guess, though, and I don't like guessing."
Snape paused a few moments. "It is, however, a conjecture based on the available facts, and matches them quite well. I believe it's quite likely to be the solution we are seeking. But it's also dangerous. I can't find any way to counteract the fumes of the flower. At all."
That it would kill Harry if it did not cure him hung in the air, unsaid.
Harry thought about it for a while, staring out the library window. "It seems to fit all of the things we know," he said slowly. "It seems almost too easy that you're the one helping me with this and that it's a potion that's the cure. But it's worth trying. I'm willing to take the risk."
'Fiori della morte'... And for once, I actually feel like I might have something to live for, with Severus. I hate it when life is ironic.
*****
1 PM, Day 6
Around lunchtime the owl came, a small brown one carrying a scroll and a dragonhide pouch sealed with several binding and containment spells to prevent the flower fumes from killing anything. Harry read the poem in Severus' herbal, consulting the dictionary several times to help with the Latin he didn't know. His word-for-word translation was vague, but the link that Snape had mentioned was clear.
It seemed that the potion was relatively simple, if one discounted the fact that one ingredient was deadly to everyone except the afflicted. Harry really hoped that was him, or he was about to be afflicted with something far worse.
I wonder if I should get my affairs in order... Oh wait, I don't have any to begin with. And it's not like I haven't been contemplating death on a daily basis for years. Why is this any different? Aren't I meant to be brave?
Not now, said a tiny voice in his head. Now you want to live. Before you didn't care; you were alone. Now there's Severus.
Snape appeared as if invoked and asked if Harry was ready to assist in the Potions lab. Harry trailed behind, feet feeling leaden.
Less than an hour later, Snape had prepared the base of the potion. All that was left was the essence of the fiori della morte. Although they doubted it would work, Harry would cast a spell that effectively surrounded him with a protective bubble, to prevent him from breathing the perfume, and wear dragonhide gloves.
Snape had to leave the room entirely from the moment the cautionary charms were taken off the package until the potion was consumed by Harry and the room and equipment were cleaned. His colleague's letter had been quite clear about that. He enchanted the heavy door to be transparent so he could watch.
Snape tidied up the worktable, leaving out only the package, cauldron, spoon, and a goblet. They went over the instructions again. Harry would remove the charms, unwrap the vial, let the vapor in it waft over the contents of the cauldron, where they would condense and rain into the potion. He would stir precisely three times clockwise, draw an arcane symbol onto the surface of the liquid, and pour the contents into the goblet. He would then perform the clean-up spells, drink the liquid in one gulp, and cast the clean-up spells again. So that Snape could rush in as quickly as possible if anything should go wrong was left unspoken.
Harry would have chafed at the fourth reiteration of the simple details but he was so nervous that he felt like he was going to be sick. Everything was ready. Snape was not walking away from the table, Harry noticed, breaking his stare at the shimmering dragonhide parcel.
Harry cleared his throat and was embarrassed at how wavery his voice was. "We didn't talk about, um, last night yet."
Snape's eyes burned into his. "We'll do it after you drink the potion."
Harry swallowed. "I wanted to say-"
Snape shook his head, interrupting. "No. Later. After you finish. We will talk."
Harry nodded. He watched his hand reach out, in slow motion, to Snape's and hold it briefly.
The other man's face was an emotionless mask, although a muscle in his jaw twitched. He squeezed Harry's hand gently, before taking a deep breath. Snape slowly let go and stepped away.
The sound of the door closing seemed to echo in Harry's ears as he turned to the worktable.
Harry cast the protection spell and put on the gloves. Don't think; just do it. He took up the package and disabled the charms.
Nothing happened.
He unwrapped the parcel, revealing a small vial of brilliant magenta gas. Still nothing.
He removed the stopper at arms length, over the cauldron. Nothing.
He realized he wasn't breathing and took a tentative breath. Nothing happened.
Carefully, but as quickly as he could, he followed every syllable of Snape's instructions. He wafted. Stirred. Drew the symbol. Poured. Cast the cleansing spells.
He paused to contemplate the goblet before him, of a potion so lethal that none but the accursed could be in the same room with it, not even its residue on a spoon.
Nothing happened.
It could be that the particles aren't really moving through the air fast enough to have inhaled it yet. Or maybe the bubble charm is working. Or the fumes are be slower acting than they thought...
He glanced up at the temporarily-transparent door to see if Snape was still there. The man looked more relieved than Harry had ever seen him look, with the possible exception of a few moments during the war. He gave Harry a brief smile and nodded, clearly wanting him to drink the potion.
So he did.
Nothing happened.
He incanted the cleaning spells again, took off the gloves, and removed the bubble charm. Snape reentered the room.
Harry's world tilted and swooped and blurred. Snape's voice echoed nonsense in his head, and Harry felt his body fall to the ground as if he were watching it happen from miles and miles away, before everything faded to blackness.
*****
2 PM, Day 6
Severus walked into the classroom after Harry cast the final clean-up charm. "That went well," he said. "You prepared the potion flawlessly, from what I saw." He turned toward Harry in time to see him sway slightly, with a far-away look in his eyes, before he crumpled to the ground.
Severus caught hold of him. And did not think. If he did not think he would not panic, so he very carefully did not think at all.
After a few moments, he realized Harry's chest was still rising and falling with breath. Unconscious then, not dead, Severus thought.
Harry twitched. He coughed.
Still unconscious, Harry gasped and coughed again, a horrible sound expelling all the air from his lungs explosively. A grey mist seeped out of his mouth, briefly formed the vague shape of a skull, and dissipated.
Severus carefully picked him up and carried Harry to bed.
*****
6 PM, Day 6
Harry awoke with what felt like the worst hangover of his entire life. His heartbeat pounding in his ears was too loud to bear. His breath was the howl of a windstorm. He couldn't even imagine moving. His lungs felt like he'd inhaled not only smoke but ashes.
At least he wasn't in the infirmary. This bed smelled different. Familiar.
He fell back to sleep.
*****
10 PM, Day 6
Severus woke up in his chair by the fireplace, to Harry leaning over him and kissing him gently. He blinked for a moment. Nice dream...
"Not a dream," whispered Harry before kissing him again.
Severus wrapped his arms around the young man and drew him onto his lap. "I presume you're feeling better?" The head on his shoulder nodded. "Did you sleep well?" Another nod.
"What happened?" Harry asked quietly, after a few minutes had passed.
Severus answered carefully, keeping any emotion out of his voice. "You brewed the potion perfectly; that you're alive proves that. Also that it was the correct antidote. You collapsed just after I came in, after coughing a few times. You exhaled some smoky air."
He paused to consider whether he should tell Harry the rest. Then again, what point was there in keeping it from him?
"The smoke you exhaled briefly formed a vague Dark Mark before it dissipated. You were still unconscious, so I carried you to bed. It's been about eight hours since you drank the potion."
There was a long pause before Harry spoke. "So you were right then. About the curse and the origin and cure." His brow wrinkled a bit as he thought. "It seemed quite easy for you."
Severus pushed him off his lap, to look him in the eye. "It was not easy. It was sheer guesswork. Something which makes me highly uncomfortable. But it was a logical solution based on what we saw in your dreams and your response to them."
Harry seemed to be getting angry about something, but Severus could only tell that from his body language; he wasn't saying a word. Suddenly Harry's stomach growled, breaking the tension.
"I have some dinner for you," Severus said, gesturing to a try on his desk. "And then you should probably try to get some more sleep." He paused. "I'm sure you won't have nightmares like that anymore."
Harry turned to look at him. Confusion clouded his expression before disappearing, replaced by resignation.
"Yes. I'll just take the food back to my rooms then, shall I?" he asked quietly.
Severus had not expected it to be so simple. "We'll talk tomorrow," he said as he passed the tray to Harry.
The young man evaded his eyes, nodding affirmative as he opened the door and left.
Severus' rooms had never before felt so empty. He poured himself a glass of port and collapsed into the chair by the fire.
It was over.
Part 9
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Author:
salixbabylonFandom: Harry Potter
Characters: Harry/Severus
Rating: NC-17 overall
Word Count: 37,100 total
Disclaimer: Characters and places in this story, which appear in the Harry Potter novels, belong to JK Rowling, Bloomsbury, Warner Bros. and Scholastic. I don't make, or intend to make money out of them. They just wouldn't leave me alone
Summary: Two years after graduation, Harry's having nightmares at Hogwarts. Who will wake him up?
Previous Chapters
2 AM, Day 6
Harry awoke to Severus' body curled around his and hands gently touching him again. He tried to control his breathing, fighting with himself not to respond or let Severus know what kind of effect the touches were having on him.
This is so stupid. When did I become such a coward? I'm scared to death, but I can't just lie here. What am I going to do?
While his mind struggled with feelings of modesty, embarrassment, and pride, his body acted on its own. Harry rolled onto his back and tentatively slid his hands up Severus' chest to his shoulders as he opened his eyes.
The darkness of the room hid nothing of the fire in those deep, intense eyes. The moment seemed like it would last forever. Gently, Severus' soft lips gently came down against his own. He's kissing me! So soft. Wonderful... Harry thought before the moment was over. Severus held his gaze for until Harry's hands again moved of their own accord from Severus' shoulders to the back of his neck, pulling him down again.
The next kiss was less tentative but no less gentle and Harry did his best to relax and enjoy it. Severus' lips were warm and smooth. Harry couldn't believe how wonderful something so simple felt, until his lips were suddenly met with a soft wet tongue probing between them. He opened his mouth in a quiet sigh. The amazingly sweet kiss began to morph into something passionate as the rest of Harry's body awoke from the fog clouding his brain from their first kiss.
His skin seemed to burst into flame; he could feel every millimeter where Severus' body pressed against his. Desire like nothing he'd ever felt swept through him. He wanted it all, everything, now, and the strength of his hunger was overwhelming. Wetness leaked down his cheeks as he moaned into Severus' mouth, clutching him closer, too transported to notice.
Again Severus was the one to pull away. When Harry opened his eyes he was met with a concerned expression as Severus gently dipped his fingertips into Harry's tears.
So much emotion filled him that it felt like his chest would burst. Instead, to his dismay, Harry found his eyes overflowing again. "I'm sorry," he whispered in a shaking voice. "I just- I didn't mean to. I'm just scared."
Severus' brow creased. "Scared of what? Not of something happening to one of us?"
"No! Of, well..." Harry looked away from the intense gaze and took a deep breath, his cheeks burning. "I don't know what I'm doing. At all," he admitted. "It was true, what I said before. No one's ever, um, kissed me before. I don't know what to do."
Severus smiled a little and answered in a velvety purr, "You're doing everything right so far. We don't have to do anything you don't want to do. Any time you want to stop, I promise it will be all right with me. Even if you just want to pause for a minute." His fingertips wiped away the moist tracks on the young man's face until Harry lifted his lips to kiss Severus again, pulling him close.
Their kisses went on and on, one melting into the other, soft kisses, tongues gently tasting each other's mouths. Every time the kisses started to grow more fervent, Severus pulled back, slowed down, and dropped tiny, soft kisses all over Harry's face. He was relieved that the other man didn't seem to want to go any faster than he wanted to, but at the same time found himself torn between the desire to lose himself in the cloying sweetness and the desire for more.
His hands grew more bold, feeling the shape of Severus' back and arms, drifting down to his waist, but not further before he got embarrassed. On their way back up, Harry suddenly found his wayward hands unbuttoning Severus' pajama top.
Severus held still until he finished, then shrugged off the shirt and rolled onto his back, pulling Harry up on top of him. The shock of warm bare skin against his own made Harry gasp, and the hardness of the erection pushing next to his own made him moan. Even through two layers of flannel, the intimate contact took his breath away.
Severus gave him a seductive smirk as his hands stroked Harry's back. "Shall I stop?"
Harry grinned back as he leaned forward and nipped at Severus' neck as an answer. His skin tasted wonderful, so Harry licked and sucked a trail up to an earlobe. When he gently pulled it into his mouth, Severus gasped and pushed his hips up into Harry's, breaking the younger man's concentration. Instinctively, Harry pushed down and they both moaned at the sensation.
Severus pulled him down for a deep kiss, more passionate than the previous ones, as if he wanted to taste every bit of Harry's mouth, sliding his tongue along Harry's and pulsing it into his mouth with the same slow thrusting rhythm as their hips.
Harry's head reeled for a moment, dizzy. Oh yes! So good. Want this. Want you..., he thought as their bodies ground into each other. Sensations and emotions crashed through him like trains on a collision course. Too fast!
"Wait. Stop," Harry panted, pushing himself away to lay next to Severus with his eyes shut.
"What's wrong?" Harry could hear the concern in Severus' voice and his accelerated breathing as well.
"Nothing. I just- I'm too close. I don't want it to be over yet," he confessed.
Something like the evil chuckle Harry remembered from class, but softer and infinitely more arousing, was breathed into his neck as Severus bent over him. "It won't be over until you want it to be, I promise," he said, licking Harry's neck.
Harry moved his head to the side to give Severus better access and moaned at the sensations flooding through him. Severus' hands began to wander over his chest and arms, barely grazing the skin with his fingertips, making Harry shiver and sigh uncontrollably.
"I thought. You said. We could stop. Any time."
Severus immediately moved back from Harry, who opened his eyes to search Severus' expression, confused.
"Of course. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push you," the older man apologized with some effort, withdrawing to the other side of the bed.
Harry took a deep breath, trying to slow down his madly beating heart. "Wait," he pleaded, reaching out to grab Severus by the wrist. "I didn't mean... I just needed to catch my breath. It's just really overwhelming. I feel- Gods, I don't know! I feel like everything in me is moving a billion miles a second. Like I can't take much more before I completely fall apart."
The corner of Severus' mouth quirked up. "That's how you're supposed to feel," he said in a voice that Harry had never heard before. Smokey. Seductive. "I'm thrilled to hear that's how I made you feel. You make me feel the same way."
His words seemed to reach into Harry and twist his insides around. He could feel the pulse in his body quicken again, and couldn't stop the slight whimper that escaped his lips. "Please," he heard himself ask, not entirely certain what he was asking.
Severus moved closer, pushing the blankets fully off of the bed, looking at Harry in the moonlight. At his body. Harry wondered how visible the blush covering his face and creeping down his chest was, and why he felt both horribly nervous and yet pleased that Severus would want to look at him.
He reached up to trail his fingers across Severus' skin, feeling the few scattered dark hairs on his chest, accenting the alabaster paleness. Harry's hands wandered up the smooth chest, lightly skimming over a nipple that made Severus suck in a shallow breath. Harry noted that for later. He continued up the long neck to the angular face, fingers tangling in the inky, silky black hair, eyes locked on the dark ones above him.
"You're so beautiful to me," Harry whispered as he leaned in for a kiss.
Severus groaned, returning his body to its former position on top of Harry's, grinding their erections together. His hands stroked a path from Harry's collarbone, down his slim chest, to his nipple. Clever fingers teased and pinched it lightly, making Harry gasp. As Severus' tongue twined around Harry's, he shifted his hands down the young man's stomach to the waistband of his boxers.
And waited.
Harry was barely conscious of the kisses stopping, lost in the fire Severus' hands were stoking in his body. One hand went away, only to come back on Harry's thigh, tickling sensitive flesh and then sliding slowly up over flannel. It paused as it rested alongside his cock; Harry's hips arched uncontrollably as his eyes locked onto Severus'.
"Oh please," he moaned, gasping as the strong hand responded, closing around his aching hardness.
Severus' hand stroked him slowly through the flannel as he dropped light kisses on Harry's forehead, temple, and neck. Harry's hands clutched onto Severus' arms, grasping for some stability as he moaned and writhed in his lover's hands.
"Oh god, please, take them off," he gasped desperately.
Fiery eyes locked onto his as Severus' hands slid to his waist, pushing the fabric down as Harry compliantly lifted his hips off the bed. Then those cool, smooth fingers were on his flesh, exploring every inch of his cock, stroking up and down. Finally Severus encircled him completely in a firm grip, and began to stroke him in earnest.
Harry's entire body was so focused, so tense, he knew he couldn't hold out for very long. He twined his arms around Severus, pulling him close for another kiss, desperate and hungry. On each exhale a keening sound escaped from deep in his throat, faster and faster as his eyes squeezed shut. He felt himself hovering on the edge of something terrifying and exquisite, Severus' body covering his own as he tenderly kissed Harry's face.
Severus' hands moved faster and faster until finally Harry's nerves could take no more. He was pulled into a firm embrace as he convulsed and howled his release in a wordless litany, blind to everything but the pleasure of his orgasm.
Harry's brain returned to his body to find his head pillowed on Severus' chest, arms wrapped around him. His toes tingled, his eyelids tingled; it felt like every cell in his body had climaxed and was still vibrating with afterglow. He sighed and smiled against Severus' chest, deeply content and satisfied.
"Back with me?"
Severus' hand smoothed down his back and Harry snuggled closer. "Mmmm," he mumbled, letting his fingers trail lightly down the other man's chest.
Severus sighed and covered Harry's hand with his own, trapping it before it could go any lower. He pulled the young man up and kissed him. "You're so beautiful when you come," he murmured against Harry's mouth, covering it with tiny kisses.
"I've never felt anything like that. Ever," Harry admitted.
Severus pulled back a little in surprise. "Ever? Not even by yourself?"
Harry shook his head. "Not like that. I've done it a few times, but... It's not easy to do without thinking of anyone. I tried every now and then but it was too hard. Once I thought of Malfoy, after he was gone. I thought it couldn't hurt. But I felt so terrible afterward. Why do you think I spent so much time flying and studying? I couldn't do anything about it and I was afraid of what would happen if I went to sleep frustrated," he explained simply.
Severus squeezed him tighter. "That's all behind you now. You're free to be as lustful as anyone else. No one can hurt you or anyone you desire."
Harry nodded. A moment later he dozed off in Severus' arms, safe and satiated.
10 AM, Day 6
Harry awoke late the next morning, naked and sticky and inordinately pleased with himself. Also alone; Severus had apparently already woken up. He smiled at the pillows. He grinned at the stone walls. He beamed at the bedroom.
I had sex! Finally! It finally happened!
He stretched his arms over his head and untangled his legs from the sheets. He called Severus' name but there was no answer, so he got out of bed and bounced into the shower. He smiled at the toilet and bathtub, and the mirror winked back at him when he grinned at it.
Thirty minutes later he noticed he was getting a cramp in his cheeks from grinning so hard but he just couldn't stop. I'm not going to be able to leave this room. Ever. He contemplated for a moment what a tragedy it would be if he could never leave Severus' bedroom. His smile grew even bigger.
Everyone will know the moment they see me and this dorky grin. And if they don't know, I'll shout it at them, scream it from the parapets, take out a notice in the paper: "Boy Who Lived Finally Gets Laid!"
Well, mostly. Perhaps not by strict definitions, but last night certainly was enough to qualify as a good beginning.
Although I hardly got to do anything to him. I hope he didn't mind very much. Shit, I guess I just kind of fell asleep, didn't I? I hope he isn't angry. I'll make it up to him next time.
I hope there's a next time... Where did Severus go? Why did he leave me? I hope he doesn't think this was a mistake. Gods, please, please don't let him think that. It wasn't a mistake. It wasn't.
Who am I trying to convince here, Severus or myself?
Maybe it was a mistake. What if I've ruined everything, whatever it is that's been going on between us? I've told him so much, he's seen so much inside my head. What if he doesn't feel about me the way I feel about him?
How do I feel about him?
Fuck. I think I might love him. I'm not sure I know what love is, but... Friendship. Plus lust. And maybe something more, that I can't quite put my finger on. But what if one of us wants more than the other? How will we avoid hurting each other in the end?
Does it have to end?
I hate being so awkward, so unsure of what to do. So embarrassed... He was even my first kiss. He didn't seem surprised, but I wonder what he thinks now, in the light of day. About me being so untouched...
My head is spinning and my body is still hungry for him... I feel so utterly vulnerable. It's terrifying.
And I can still feel his hands everywhere on my skin.
11 AM, Day 6
Severus was in the library again. Working, he reminded himself, wrenching his unruly thoughts from memories of last night and onto the books in front of him.
Lucius definitely thought up this curse. Narcissa's family was Italian originally, from somewhere in the Northern region, I seem to recall... Which means the cure, if there is one, probably comes from plants native to that area. Assuming I'm on the right track at all. A pity none of these herbals are arranged geographically...
Every time I get in bed with him, I completely lose control. I just can't stop touching him. He's too young, too fragile right now. I don't want to hurt him. But gods - I want to prove to him that he's not broken, not poisonous. He's beautiful. Pure.
And his skin is addictive. And the noises he makes. And the way he responds...
I hope last night wasn't a mistake. I hope he doesn't regret it.
I hope he doesn't regret that it was me. I can't accept that he wants me that way. Me, of all people.
This is moving too fast. It's not even been a week and I'm in love. Love. Me. With Harry bloody Potter. Of all the unexpected things in the universe, that's the last one I'd have thought possible.
Focus! This isn't helping anything. Read.
I hope he's not upset that I left him in bed. I know he's exhausted. By all rights I should be too. But he was sleeping so soundly that I didn't want to wake him. And for once, I don't think he was dreaming of anything at all. I hope not anyway.
He deserves so much. To be whole and happy and at peace. And to be loved. So much more than I could ever give him...
But. If no one else wants him... And if he seems to want me, for whatever reason... Who am I to push him away? I may not deserve him but I'll try.
I want to more than anything I've ever wanted.
11 AM, Day 6
Harry stumbled into the library. One glance and Severus took in the conflicting expressions on his face; eyes filled with fear but mouth twitching and threatening to break into a grin.
"Sleep well?" Severus asked with a sparkle in his eyes that did not match his dry tone.
Harry nodded and stretched his arms over his head, ginning hugely, as he turned slightly pink. "I did. I'm sorry you, uh, didn't," he said somewhat questioningly.
Snape took his meaning. "I was satisfied."
Harry grinned again and looked at his feet. "Well, I hope you'll be more satisfied the next time. If there is a next time," he added when Severus failed to respond.
"Harry... We should talk about this. And we should finish with the curse. But one thing at a time. I suggest we deal with that first, if it's all right with you?"
Harry nodded quickly, disappointed by Snape's businesslike tone.
Snape continued. "I've gathered that this curse was conceived by Lucius Malfoy. Which may or may not have had an effect on its power once he was killed. If it did, that would explain why things got worse afterward. If not, well, no matter unless it complicates things further." He took a deep breath.
"I know this is going to sound like a highly fanciful shot in the dark at best, but I've learned over the years that following one's intuition is most valuable in counteracting the Dark Arts; the unconscious mind reveals patterns the conscious, logical mind cannot see."
"A few elements of an old story reminded me of your curse. Narcissa Malfoy's family was Italian. So was the story, which is about a toxic garden and the young girl who tended it. Some herbals seem to indicate a hint of underlying truth in the tale, that an extract of a highly deadly flower may be both a deadly poison and an antidote."
"I remember Lucius once mentioning something in passing as we discussed Dark potions, about a 'fiori della morte,' a 'flower of death,' found in the highest mountains near where Narcissa's family was from. Only those who had been raised in the area could get close to the flower at all without succumbing to its toxic vapors. No stranger could touch it and live."
Severus smiled wryly. "Lucius liked to combine subtlety and poetry into his curses, natural beauty and evil mixed in equal parts. To make them truly an art. He told me about the flower long before he knew I was a spy, but near the time Voldemort must have cursed you. I'm sure he thought I would appreciate the twisted beauty of such a curse and the only possible antidote."
"However, having had this idea, I don't think there is a way to test it except by trying. I have a colleague in Italy who I contacted earlier this morning and she is owling me some of the flower extract. One of the books I found from the 1300s has a potion recipe that mentioned both the flower and nightmares in an opening poem. It is all a guess, though, and I don't like guessing."
Snape paused a few moments. "It is, however, a conjecture based on the available facts, and matches them quite well. I believe it's quite likely to be the solution we are seeking. But it's also dangerous. I can't find any way to counteract the fumes of the flower. At all."
That it would kill Harry if it did not cure him hung in the air, unsaid.
Harry thought about it for a while, staring out the library window. "It seems to fit all of the things we know," he said slowly. "It seems almost too easy that you're the one helping me with this and that it's a potion that's the cure. But it's worth trying. I'm willing to take the risk."
'Fiori della morte'... And for once, I actually feel like I might have something to live for, with Severus. I hate it when life is ironic.
1 PM, Day 6
Around lunchtime the owl came, a small brown one carrying a scroll and a dragonhide pouch sealed with several binding and containment spells to prevent the flower fumes from killing anything. Harry read the poem in Severus' herbal, consulting the dictionary several times to help with the Latin he didn't know. His word-for-word translation was vague, but the link that Snape had mentioned was clear.
It seemed that the potion was relatively simple, if one discounted the fact that one ingredient was deadly to everyone except the afflicted. Harry really hoped that was him, or he was about to be afflicted with something far worse.
I wonder if I should get my affairs in order... Oh wait, I don't have any to begin with. And it's not like I haven't been contemplating death on a daily basis for years. Why is this any different? Aren't I meant to be brave?
Not now, said a tiny voice in his head. Now you want to live. Before you didn't care; you were alone. Now there's Severus.
Snape appeared as if invoked and asked if Harry was ready to assist in the Potions lab. Harry trailed behind, feet feeling leaden.
Less than an hour later, Snape had prepared the base of the potion. All that was left was the essence of the fiori della morte. Although they doubted it would work, Harry would cast a spell that effectively surrounded him with a protective bubble, to prevent him from breathing the perfume, and wear dragonhide gloves.
Snape had to leave the room entirely from the moment the cautionary charms were taken off the package until the potion was consumed by Harry and the room and equipment were cleaned. His colleague's letter had been quite clear about that. He enchanted the heavy door to be transparent so he could watch.
Snape tidied up the worktable, leaving out only the package, cauldron, spoon, and a goblet. They went over the instructions again. Harry would remove the charms, unwrap the vial, let the vapor in it waft over the contents of the cauldron, where they would condense and rain into the potion. He would stir precisely three times clockwise, draw an arcane symbol onto the surface of the liquid, and pour the contents into the goblet. He would then perform the clean-up spells, drink the liquid in one gulp, and cast the clean-up spells again. So that Snape could rush in as quickly as possible if anything should go wrong was left unspoken.
Harry would have chafed at the fourth reiteration of the simple details but he was so nervous that he felt like he was going to be sick. Everything was ready. Snape was not walking away from the table, Harry noticed, breaking his stare at the shimmering dragonhide parcel.
Harry cleared his throat and was embarrassed at how wavery his voice was. "We didn't talk about, um, last night yet."
Snape's eyes burned into his. "We'll do it after you drink the potion."
Harry swallowed. "I wanted to say-"
Snape shook his head, interrupting. "No. Later. After you finish. We will talk."
Harry nodded. He watched his hand reach out, in slow motion, to Snape's and hold it briefly.
The other man's face was an emotionless mask, although a muscle in his jaw twitched. He squeezed Harry's hand gently, before taking a deep breath. Snape slowly let go and stepped away.
The sound of the door closing seemed to echo in Harry's ears as he turned to the worktable.
Harry cast the protection spell and put on the gloves. Don't think; just do it. He took up the package and disabled the charms.
Nothing happened.
He unwrapped the parcel, revealing a small vial of brilliant magenta gas. Still nothing.
He removed the stopper at arms length, over the cauldron. Nothing.
He realized he wasn't breathing and took a tentative breath. Nothing happened.
Carefully, but as quickly as he could, he followed every syllable of Snape's instructions. He wafted. Stirred. Drew the symbol. Poured. Cast the cleansing spells.
He paused to contemplate the goblet before him, of a potion so lethal that none but the accursed could be in the same room with it, not even its residue on a spoon.
Nothing happened.
It could be that the particles aren't really moving through the air fast enough to have inhaled it yet. Or maybe the bubble charm is working. Or the fumes are be slower acting than they thought...
He glanced up at the temporarily-transparent door to see if Snape was still there. The man looked more relieved than Harry had ever seen him look, with the possible exception of a few moments during the war. He gave Harry a brief smile and nodded, clearly wanting him to drink the potion.
So he did.
Nothing happened.
He incanted the cleaning spells again, took off the gloves, and removed the bubble charm. Snape reentered the room.
Harry's world tilted and swooped and blurred. Snape's voice echoed nonsense in his head, and Harry felt his body fall to the ground as if he were watching it happen from miles and miles away, before everything faded to blackness.
2 PM, Day 6
Severus walked into the classroom after Harry cast the final clean-up charm. "That went well," he said. "You prepared the potion flawlessly, from what I saw." He turned toward Harry in time to see him sway slightly, with a far-away look in his eyes, before he crumpled to the ground.
Severus caught hold of him. And did not think. If he did not think he would not panic, so he very carefully did not think at all.
After a few moments, he realized Harry's chest was still rising and falling with breath. Unconscious then, not dead, Severus thought.
Harry twitched. He coughed.
Still unconscious, Harry gasped and coughed again, a horrible sound expelling all the air from his lungs explosively. A grey mist seeped out of his mouth, briefly formed the vague shape of a skull, and dissipated.
Severus carefully picked him up and carried Harry to bed.
6 PM, Day 6
Harry awoke with what felt like the worst hangover of his entire life. His heartbeat pounding in his ears was too loud to bear. His breath was the howl of a windstorm. He couldn't even imagine moving. His lungs felt like he'd inhaled not only smoke but ashes.
At least he wasn't in the infirmary. This bed smelled different. Familiar.
He fell back to sleep.
10 PM, Day 6
Severus woke up in his chair by the fireplace, to Harry leaning over him and kissing him gently. He blinked for a moment. Nice dream...
"Not a dream," whispered Harry before kissing him again.
Severus wrapped his arms around the young man and drew him onto his lap. "I presume you're feeling better?" The head on his shoulder nodded. "Did you sleep well?" Another nod.
"What happened?" Harry asked quietly, after a few minutes had passed.
Severus answered carefully, keeping any emotion out of his voice. "You brewed the potion perfectly; that you're alive proves that. Also that it was the correct antidote. You collapsed just after I came in, after coughing a few times. You exhaled some smoky air."
He paused to consider whether he should tell Harry the rest. Then again, what point was there in keeping it from him?
"The smoke you exhaled briefly formed a vague Dark Mark before it dissipated. You were still unconscious, so I carried you to bed. It's been about eight hours since you drank the potion."
There was a long pause before Harry spoke. "So you were right then. About the curse and the origin and cure." His brow wrinkled a bit as he thought. "It seemed quite easy for you."
Severus pushed him off his lap, to look him in the eye. "It was not easy. It was sheer guesswork. Something which makes me highly uncomfortable. But it was a logical solution based on what we saw in your dreams and your response to them."
Harry seemed to be getting angry about something, but Severus could only tell that from his body language; he wasn't saying a word. Suddenly Harry's stomach growled, breaking the tension.
"I have some dinner for you," Severus said, gesturing to a try on his desk. "And then you should probably try to get some more sleep." He paused. "I'm sure you won't have nightmares like that anymore."
Harry turned to look at him. Confusion clouded his expression before disappearing, replaced by resignation.
"Yes. I'll just take the food back to my rooms then, shall I?" he asked quietly.
Severus had not expected it to be so simple. "We'll talk tomorrow," he said as he passed the tray to Harry.
The young man evaded his eyes, nodding affirmative as he opened the door and left.
Severus' rooms had never before felt so empty. He poured himself a glass of port and collapsed into the chair by the fire.
It was over.
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![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 09:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 04:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 09:39 pm (UTC)Great chapter by the way lol.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 04:09 am (UTC)Thank you for reading - last chapter coming on Monday!
no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 09:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 04:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 10:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 04:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 10:34 pm (UTC)Now who's going to make the "Let's be friends" speak and who's going to kiss the other first?
And how long do I have to wait to find out?
(wiggles with anticipation)
no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 04:02 am (UTC)Glad you like it!
no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 10:52 pm (UTC)great chapter :D cant wait for the last *le gaspe* one
no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 03:54 am (UTC)One more chapter! :)
no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 11:41 pm (UTC)And I want to knock some sense into both boys. :P
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Date: 2007-05-18 03:45 am (UTC)They are a bit stubborn, aren't they? They both resist anything that seems too easy...
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Date: 2007-05-18 02:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 03:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 03:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 03:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-18 02:32 am (UTC)I like the igeniousness (is that a word) of the cure Severus had Harry make. And that Harry actually expelled the curse. Great idea!
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Date: 2007-05-18 03:23 am (UTC)Glad you liked how the curse played out. Now all we have to do is have some kind of resolution for everything else.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-19 11:59 pm (UTC)Glad to see you're enjoying the icon :D
no subject
Date: 2007-05-20 03:45 am (UTC)Glad you liked Harry's invincible grin. Severus is a bit more set in his ways - all will be resolved one way or the other on Monday!