Fic: Stages of Acceptance (Ewan/Eric, NC-17, for 50kinkyways)

[salixbabylon]

Title: Stages of Acceptance
Author: heartofslash
Fandom: RPS
Characters: Ewan McGregor/Eric Bana
Prompt: 33. Age Play
Word Count: 2500
Rating: NC-17
Author's Notes: Ewan suggests something new, and at first it's too much for Eric.

Warning: This is kinky to the extreme. I was squicked while writing it, but hey, salixbabylon didn't want to do the age play thing (and I don't blame her) and since live to make her life easier... Do NOT read this if age play squicks you.

Disclaimer: We in no way condone the sexual interaction of minors with adults. This is for play only.


Stages of Acceptance

Anger

"That's just sick," Eric says.

"No, it's not."

"It's perverted, that's what it is."

"Oh, and you pissing on me wasn't perverted?"

"That was different."

"No it wasn't."


Denial

"People really do that?"

"Yeah."

"For real?"

"No, for play."

"I've never heard of it before. You're making this up."

"How could I make up something like that?"

"You are a kinky bastard."

"I'm not that kinky."

"You let me piss on you."

"Point taken."

"You let me whip you."

"But you're the one who made me count the strokes. Out loud."

"Well, it wouldn't have been much fun for me if you counted in your head."

"See? You're the one who gets off on the ritual aspect of things."

"But this is more than that."


Bargaining

"It's not so different from any other kind of role playing," Ewan says.

"You think?"

"You like it when we role play, don't you?"

"When we role play, we're playing grown men. We always pretend to be soldiers."

"Except for that one time..."

"That was different."

"How?"

"We were in a church."

"Yeah. Well, we'll be at home for this. I'm not asking you to do it in public or anything."

"I don't want to do it anywhere."

"Come on, you'll still be an adult."

"And you'll be a child. That's sick."

"It's only pretend. Like when you pretend to dominate me."

"You mean you're not really submitting to me?"

"No. Yes. I am. I'm submitting. Just not... Are you really submitting when you submit to me?"

"Of course I am!"

"Umm. Maybe you're too literal for this kinky thing. Maybe you can't handle it."

"I can so!"

"I don't know, Eric. If you're having this much trouble with a little role playing..."

"I know what you're trying to do."

"Me? I'm not trying anything."

"It won't work."


Depression

"Fuck, Ewan, maybe I'm not any good at this. Maybe it is too much for me. I'm not strong enough."

"You're plenty strong."

"Well, maybe I'm not smart enough then. I can't wrap my head 'round it all. Not imaginative enough. I just can't get past it. It's creepy. I don't get off on children. It's wrong."

"You wouldn't be getting off on a child. You'd be getting off on me."

"You acting like a child."

"I get accused of that often enough..."

"I just can't. I'm sorry. I hate to refuse you anything, but I'm not good enough."

"Maybe you're too good."

"You're just saying that."


Acceptance

Eric has the script in his hand but he can't find the note that came with it. It lists all the pages with changes, and if he can't find the note he'll have to read every damn page of the thing and it's a fucking epic. It's been a very long day, he's tired, and it's a ridiculously long script. He doesn't even know if he wants to negotiate for the role until he sees what they've done with the character, and his agent told him the list was attached to the front of the script but there isn't even a paperclip in sight.

"Ewan, have you seen the note that came with this script? It has a list of the changes on it and..."

Fuck me dead, Eric thinks.

Ewan stands in the bedroom doorway wearing nothing but a pair of striped pyjama bottoms and a sleepy expression. His hair is every which way and there's not other word for it – it's tousled. He looks like a little boy.

Except for the hair on his chest.

And the partial erection.

Not that little boys don't get partial erections, but even a fully erect little boy erection isn't that big.

Ewan rubs his eyes. "Note? I saw the script on the counter earlier."

Eric gets up because he had a sudden need to tower over Ewan. "It was on the coffee table."

Ewan blinks and it makes his eyes go big and innocent. "That's what I meant. Coffee table."

Eric's cock gets hard.

Kinky little fucker, he thinks. He planned it.

"Did you move my script?" Eric asks in a calm, dad-like voice.

"No!" Ewan protests, a little too much. Just enough too much. God, he's good. He looks nervous. Even a little scared.

Eric is into this now, but he doesn't want to draw it out too long because sooner or later something is going to remind him of how sick and perverted and wrong this is.

"Does my boy need a spanking to remind him to be good?"

Ewan's eyes grow even larger. So does his cock.

Eric pulls out a kitchen chair and sits down. "Come here, boy."

Ewan nods and takes baby steps to Eric's lap. "Yes, sir," he says, which is perfect because if he'd said 'daddy' Eric would have snapped out of whatever it was that's got into him. He bends over Eric's lap and Eric smooths his hand over the soft cotton pyjamas.

He should have told Ewan to pull them down. It was his responsibility. Ewan couldn't pull them down on his own because no kid ever volunteers for a bare-bottomed spanking. So it's Eric's fault that there are pyjamas covering the bottom he wishes was bare.

Jesus this parenting thing is complicated.

He warms Ewan up with a few swats. "I don't like it when my boy misbehaves," he says in the same, controlled parental tone. He knows that's important. Never spank in anger.

"I'm sorry," Ewan says in a small voice. "I didn't mean to be bad."

Eric has the urge to pull Ewan up into his arms and cradle him, soothe him.

Fuck that. This might be his only opportunity. It's still a bit sick and perverted, but if he's going to be sick and perverted, he's going to do it all out.

"Is there anything else you need to tell me?"

Ewan wiggles on his lap. Eric can't tell if it's part of the act or if Ewan's cock is being crushed. Eric tightens his thigh muscle. It bulges up. Ewan gasps.

Thought so.

"Um, I drank milk right out of the carton," Ewan says.

Eric gives him a full-on spank. The cotton bunches up under his fingers.

"And I left the bathroom light on."

Another spank.

"And... I bummed a smoke off one of the crew at break time."

What? No wonder Ewan went straight to the bathroom when he got back from work. Eric can still smell the mouthwash.

They have an agreement. It's for health and fitness reasons, and mutual support. Neither of them smokes. For any reason. That's it. End of subject.

"Get up," Eric says quietly.

Ewan stands.

"Pull down your pants."

Ewan pushes the pyjamas down past his bottom, which is barely blushing. Yet. His cock bobs up.

"You've been very naughty," Eric says, and he gives the cock a little slap.

"Yes, I have," Ewan moans.

"Over my lap. Now."

Eric grabs Ewan's hip and pulls him across so his cock gets trapped between Eric's thighs. Ewan's head is upside down. His face is going to get red, but not as red as his ass.

"You like to count, don't you?"

"Yes, sir." Ewan's voice sounds funny when it's upside down. Muffled.

"After I spank, you will say 'That was number one, I love you daddy.' And you'll count every spank."

"What?"

Eric spanks. Hard. It's loud and his hand stings and the hand print is clear.

"Well?"

Ewan wriggles again – NOT something likely to dissuade Eric. His cock is tugged by Eric's hard thighs. "That was number one," he whispers.

Eric pats his bum.

"I love you, daddy."

Eric spanks again.

"Th-that was number two. I love you, daddy."

Eric doesn't think he'll get in many spanks before he comes in his jeans. He forces himself to spank again and again, and every time Ewan's voice gets a little rougher, and his ass gets a lot redder, and when he wriggles Eric can feel a bit of wetness between his thighs. He keeps spanking even when Ewan starts to outright cry. And then he turns his hand so a finger taps on Ewan's asshole for a few more spanks.

Ewan chokes as he says, "That was number fifteen." He sways and his cheek rubs wetly against Eric's calf. "I love you, daddy."

Eric spreads his legs and heaves Ewan's legs over his thigh and pushes Ewan down between his legs. He unzips himself because Ewan probably can't see very clearly and he doesn't want to waste any fucking time. "You know what to do to make daddy feel better," he says and his voice is almost as choked as Ewan's.

Ewan falls on his cock and sucks hard, like someone who doesn't have all that much experience with sucking cock. There's some choking and some tongue and teeth and more choking and his fingers dig into Eric's thighs. Ewan is moaning around Eric's cock and sniffling at the same time. Fuck, he's good. Eric can see his ass, pink and perfect, because Ewan's not quite kneeling and his ass is sticking out like he's trying to get it as far away from Eric as possible. Maybe the air is cooler on that side of the room.

"Poor thing," Eric says, not sure where the urge to be such a prick is coming from but he's going along because he always plays his roles best when he lets himself go and becomes the part. "Your bum must be sore. Turn around and let me look at it."

Ewan sniffs and pulls his mouth off Eric's cock with a sucking noise. He shuffles around so he's facing away from Eric on his hands and knees.

Eric reaches one long arm between Ewan's shoulder blades and presses down. "Just relax," he says. "Daddy will make it feel better."

Ewan settles down with his head on his forearms and his ass in the air.

Eric looks down at it. The pyjamas are at mid-thigh, and everything above that is reddened. What a perfectly spanked ass, Eric thinks. He can't fuck it. It's all swollen and sore and Eric wants to keep his pants on. There's just something about his pants being on while Ewan's are down around his legs. If Eric fucks him, his zipper will shred that delicate, abused skin.

So Eric grabs his cock, which is still wet from Ewan's mouth. He has no control over himself now. He jerks off hard and fast. "You're going to be good from now on?" he grunts.

"Yes, daddy. I'll be good. I won't touch your things, and I'll do everything right, and I won't smoke ever again."

Smoking. Fuck. Eric should have taken into the bathroom and washed his mouth out with soap.

Maybe this isn't the only time they'll do this.

But this time is drawing to a close, because Eric is staring down and picturing spatters of his come all over that rosy bottom and yes, this is it. He grunts and struggles to keep his eyes open so he can watch. Ewan gasps when the come hit him and he sticks his ass up a little higher so the tip of Eric's spewing cock skims across his tender, hot skin.

Damn. Maybe Eric should have fucked him after all.

Eric slides down off the chair. Actually, the chair slides behind him because his body is willing itself closer to the floor and the only way that can happen is if the chair gets the Fuck. Out. Of. The. Way. Now he's kneeling and he's got both hands on Ewan's ass, spreading the come over it, feeling it burn. "That's it. This'll make it feel all better." He rubs the come into Ewan's skin.

Ewan makes a little choking sound and Eric has to pull him onto his lap again, right side up this time. Ewan buries his wet face against Eric's neck and Eric puts his arms all the way around him and rocks a bit. "Shhh. See? It's okay now."

But it isn't, because Ewan has a very unchildlike erection and he's twisted so it's poking Eric in the stomach. Eric reaches down, really happy that his hands are so fucking big.

First he pets the cock gently, as if it's a pet. "Is that sore too?"

Ewan nods against his neck.

Eric gives a little squeeze. "I bet that feels uncomfortable," he says.

Ewan gives his neck an encouraging lick.

Eric covers Ewan's cock with his hand, rests it there heavily. "There, there. That'll go away with time."

Ewan takes a bite of Eric's neck.

"Hey! Biting isn't allowed? Do you need more punishment?"

Ewan looks so close to breaking character it's almost amusing. Eric waits patiently while Ewan struggles to get himself under control. For once, Ewan doesn't look like he's going to laugh. He might start crying again. He bites his lip.

"No, daddy. I promise to be good."

Eric curls his fingers around the swollen flesh and tugs gently. "You show daddy how much you love him," Eric whispers. He has to whisper. He's all out of breath. He strokes steadily, a little more pressure, a little more speed.

Ewan winds his arms around Eric's neck and presses his mouth against Eric's lips. It's a sloppy kiss, and it makes Eric's guts turn over. Oh jesus, he's going to come while he's kissing me, and I don't know if I'm going to survive it. Ewan gasps and cries into Eric's mouth and the come spurts between them. Ewan goes limp in Eric's hand and arms and snuggles against him, exhausted. Just like a kid.

Eric has to shift to straighten his left leg, which is cramping under the weight of a fully grown man on his lap.

"Jesus fucking christ," Ewan mutters against Eric's chest.

"Language!" Eric warns. "I'll have to wash your mouth out with soap." Oh, god, the thought of his soapy fingers inside Ewan's mouth, of Ewan's tongue trying to avoid the suds, of putting Ewan's face under the shower to rinse the soap out... But he's spent. Done for the night.

There's always tomorrow. It'll be soooo easy to get Ewan to swear enough again to warrant getting his mouth washed out with soap.

His cell phone rings, the one he's always supposed to answer. He leans over and manages to grab it off the counter. "What?" he answers it.

"Eric? I'm so sorry about the script."

It's his agent's new assistant, the one that's a bit flighty.

"I was supposed to send you the note with all the corrections attached but there was a cock up and you were sent the copy without any changes at all."

Eric looks down at Ewan who is almost asleep against his chest. Who never touched his script or 'misplaced' the note.

"S'okay, mate. I'm beat. I'll get it tomorrow on set."

Ewan looks up sleepily. "What is it?" he asks.

Eric smiles down at him. "God, you're good," he says.

~end~

Comments

[nilhenwen.livejournal.com]

A HA HA! Lol... well that was vertainly different.

And nice choice of words on the "cock up" there at the end...

And excellent ending line of course... as always =D

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

I was hoping someone would notice the cock up. *snerk*

Thanks.

[nilhenwen.livejournal.com]

It's your attention to detail that enthralls me! lol =D

[gattodoro.livejournal.com]

Well, umm, that should be squicky, I agree, but actually its damn hot, mostly because you've written Eric as such a very responsible, if aroused, adult and Ewan is clearly just playing around in order to get a good spanking.

Great job.

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

*phew* If I achieved hot, my job is done. Now I can retire to that nunnery...

Thanks. I like playing with these boys. I'm going to miss them when the table is completed.

[second-banana.livejournal.com]

Well done. This is excellent, especially since this is not one of your kinks. I felt bad for Eric at the beginning. Is it bad that Eric feeling like he's failing and just not good enough makes me more uncomfortable than the consensual age play?

The image of sleepy tousled Ewan will keep me warm and fuzzy all day long.

You handled this very very well.

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

Now you're wondering how many other kinks I write about that I don't share. *g*

Is it bad that Eric feeling like he's failing and just not good enough makes me more uncomfortable than the consensual age play?

Not at all. I think that was part of the point of it all. Everything is okay if it is consensual. (So actual pedophilia is always wrong, because a child cannot consent.)

Yeah, I like the idea of Ewan getting up. *heh*

[mlyn.livejournal.com]

Excellent job pulling it out and making it work. It still squicked me a bit toward the end AND YET it made me hot. Normally the two don't go hand-in-hand. That you can write and incite the same feelings is a great achievement. Bravo!

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

It's not easy to squick and hot at the same time - it certainly helped that Eric Bana and Ewan McGregor were involved. Tehy can make a lot of things seem okay.

Like Chopper, for instance. And Ewan is the only person I would ever go see a Woody Allen movie for.

Thank you, darlin'. I'm glad I got it over with. I think I'm more comfortable with stuff like sub/Dom and peeing and rimming and interspecies smut. You know, normal stuff.

[tasyfa.livejournal.com]

It didn't show that you squicked yourself writing it, in case you were wondering. I liked that neither you nor Eric held anything back once he committed to the idea. And it was rather delightfully wicked. :D

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much. Yes, it was absolutely a case of me deciding that once I committed, I would not back down, and that is why I decided the same thing for Eric.

Oh, geez, does that mean Eric Bana is my Mary Sue???

How warped does that make me?

Hmmm, no more perverted than usual...

[illuminated-sin.livejournal.com]

HOLY SHIT, this was heart-poundingly, achingly, amazingly hot in a way that probably should have been more uncomfortable than it was for me (if that made any sense at all). I need a cold shower. My brain melted. Good lord, I need to go sit on a glacier or something. ACK!

::fans self::

O_O

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

It should have been as uncomfortable for you as it was for poor Ewan. So come on over tonight, I'll give you a good spanking, and then we'll see what we can do about getting your brain back in order. *leers*

*kisses everything better*

[illuminated-sin.livejournal.com]

Heh. Keep talking like that and you'll NEVER get rid of me. ;D

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

Awesome!

Icon aside: I had a housemate years ago and he had a girlfriend who used to hang out a lot and she had gloves like those. It took her almost half an hour to get into the damn things but damn, that's one sexy look!

[illuminated-sin.livejournal.com]

ROWR! I know, I love those gloves! XD Major hotness! :D

(OMG we're co-perving over fetish clothing; is that allowed here? ;P)

[salixbabylon.livejournal.com]

allowed? *ENCOURAGED*! :)

[illuminated-sin.livejournal.com]

Oh, well as long as we're going to make it a pervy TRIO here...why the hell not? ;)

[foxrafer.livejournal.com]

I think you did a wonderful job of walking that line because this wasn't squicky at all. The first age play story I read did turn me off and I haven't really read any since. But taking us through Eric's reactions to the idea, and how he's kind of surprised to find himself turned on at the sight of Ewan looking like a little boy, it really makes it feel more natural. The ending is really perfect.

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much. My plan was to ease into it a bit before going full throttle. I appear to have managed that feat without driving my car into a tree. *waits for the Eric-muse to bop me over the head for mocking his real-life counterpart's driving skills*

I know seeing Ewan looking like a little boy would do things to MY morals.

[illuminated-sin.livejournal.com]

You know, I must admit, I had to come back and read this one again tonight.... *cough*

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

Glad to hear it, ya perv! *snogs*

[illuminated-sin.livejournal.com]

;)

[angiepen.livejournal.com]

This was excellent. I loved the structure, with the stages of grief, which was sort of whacked in this situation but it worked and I'm not going to worry about why. And the sex scene was incredibly hot and not at all squicky or ewwy or whatever. There's nothing wrong with two consenting adults roleplaying, period. [shrug] Great job.

Angie

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

Icon LOVE!

I was trying to think of the ways you do something you don't really want to do. First I tried to think of some way to weasel out of writing age play, and then I for some reason thought about ways people prepare for the wrost and Kubler-Ross popped into my mind.

What can I say? I'm a dweeb. Heh.

I can't imagine doing age play, but thanks to this experience I can now imagine really wanting to watch two hot men do it together;) And Eric has really nice hands...

Thank you very much.

[marius2045.livejournal.com]

OMG, how could I miss that part? I was expecting a big eeeeeww at some point but it actually never came. That was one hell of a writing you did here and if I haven't loved your series before, I certainly would now. Very, very kinky good!

[fuzzyoverlord39.livejournal.com]

*blinks*

Wonderful. You've taken a thing that makes many people squicky and managed to morph in into one of THE MOST brain-melting, eye boggling pieces of awesomeness that I have had the pleasure of reading. I love it.

And I need a sponge to clean my brain up from the floor.

[heartofslash.livejournal.com]

Thank you. That was one neither of us was comfortable writing, but since Salix was writing a couple of others that squicked me, I decided it was time to man up and do the deed.

And I figured if I was oging to do it, I'd better not wimp out.

As I recall, it was a lot of fun, once I threw my inhibitions out the window and got all kinked out.

BTW, *icon love*

[fuzzyoverlord39.livejournal.com]

Inhibitions= Not good for fanfiction XD

I honestly don't know if I'd have been able to do this