salixbabylon | Fic: If I Could Rearrange the Alphabet, I'd Put "U" and "I" Together (26/26)

Title: If I Could Rearrange the Alphabet, I'd Put "U" and "I" Together
Author:

salixbabylon
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17 (overall)
Word Count: 616
Disclaimer: No offense meant at all to the real guys. This is just fiction, people.

Summary: Jared and Jensen take a romp through the alphabet, teasing each other relentlessly all the way. AKA domestic schmoop, guy-style.

Notes: Thanks go out to everyone who contributed word prompts –

aelfwitchfic,

okinay,

tularia,

sarka,

anorienparker,

violetlemon47,

gigglingkat,

baileymoyes,

griffndor,

autumn_witch78,

seanlily,

arieltachna, and

sileya. And of course to

sarka for her writing help and betaing.

If I Could Rearrange the Alphabet, I'd Put "U" and "I" Together

Z is for Zombies in Texas, from

gigglingkat

"Fine, you win. Your parents were cool - you get to drive."

"Whoo!" Jared yelled, catching the keys Jensen tossed at him. "Only good part about my babies being back at home is that we can have one of these fine machines," he said, practically fondling the curves of the sleek sports car.

"You know," Jensen said almost an hour later, pulling a loose thread from the hole at the knee of his jeans, "I am perfectly fine with conceding that your parents are more awesome than mine. I like your folks. I don't think we need to tell mine."

"Don't pussy out on me, Jen."

"Come on; it's the holidays. I just want see everyone and relax, not have some big drama," he whined.

Jared glanced over at him. "You sure it's gonna be that bad? I mean, I know they're religious and all, but they love you. I think they'll be all right."

Jensen shrugged and was quiet for a while, the miles slipping away as they put San Antonio further behind them. "We're just not like your family," he finally said. Jared had a ton of responses to that but wisely held his tongue and let Jensen continue at his own speed. "We don't talk about stuff. Feelings. Relationships. Certainly not about sex."

"I wasn't planning on telling them how much I like to slide my dick inside you and fuck your sweet, tight hole," Jared pointed out.

"They don't even know I'm bi."

Jared glanced at him again. "They're your family dude; do you really think they need it spelled out? I knew."

Jensen threw his hands up in an exasperated gesture. "Well then I guess we won't have to tell them after all, right?"

Jared made a frustrated sound before getting absorbed by traffic as they neared Austin. They drove into the morning commute, finally slowing as they approached some road construction. "Whoa! Dude, look," he said, pointing and shaking Jensen out of his gloomy thoughts.

ZOMBIES IN AREA! RUN! flashed in red and black on the traffic warning signs.

"What the fuck..."

Jared laughed hysterically and reached forward to play with the radio to find a local news station. Jensen slapped his hand away. "I'll do it, idiot, before you kill us." He didn't find anything on the news channels, but it was pretty obvious that some kid must have reprogrammed the signs as a joke.

"That's pretty goddamned awesome," Jared grinned. "Can you imagine? Zombies in fucking Texas!"

Jensen shook his head. "Only you would find the idea of being eaten by animated corpses hilarious."

"Ass," Jared responded, taking one hand off the wheel to shove Jensen. "So, what's worse - telling your momma that you and I are shacked up as 'extra special friends' or her being eaten by zombies?"

There was a long pause. "I guess the zombies."

"You suck," Jared snorted.

"So says the cock-slut with the oral fixation," Jensen smirked.

"Fuck you. You love it."

"I do." There was a slight pause before Jensen reached over to put his hand on Jared's thigh. "I love you. I wouldn't even consider telling my folks if I didn't think this was gonna last."

Jared's grin was blinding. "Awww... You're such a sap."

Jensen crossed his arms and looked out the window, scowling.

"Hey," Jared said, waiting until Jensen relented and turned to look at him. "It would take zombies or something to get rid of me, you know. I'm not letting you go. Not ever."

"I'm not sure if that's sweet or terrifying," Jensen murmured.

"Both?"

Their laughter filled the rented sports car as it ate up the miles toward Dallas and the rest of their lives.

~end~